Shalom

I'm certain my neighbor believes I've broken the truce. That would be the one where I agree not to have 70 people on my back patio at 10:30 and he agrees that his leaf blower he revs up at 8:00 a.m. every Saturday morning really wouldn't fit up his ass, and besides, I'm nonviolent, damnit, but while we're at it, shutup your godamned dog. There were a few finer points, mostly hashed over by our wives which I'm sure pissed him off even more because, side by side, there's no denying that my wife is better looking. Much. And she's got 10 years on his wife. If not in age, definitely experience. So there! But he's too dumb to realize that it wasn't us. It was the neighbors, moron! So he's retaliating -- as I write -- with his dog. Doesn't the dumbass know you can't retaliate unless you've been hit first? So this becomes a pre-emptive strike. And I'll be damned if I'm going to sit here and take an unprovoked pre-emptive strike on something I didn't do. Never mind that it doesn't make sense! Now were's my damned stereo speaker wires?