Place Names

This is part whatever of my series on the Ozarks. This is intended for my non-Ozarkian readers out there who don't know what life in southwest Missouir is truly like, especially what it's like to live in the Queen City of the Ozarks -- Springfield. I mean, really, in a a city were fundamentalist Christainity is paramount, why would they want to nickname themselves the Queen City?

Of course, it could be worse. We could be living in Sleeper. Or Pecular. Or Licking. Or Climax Springs. That's an oxymoron at best.

And then there's Kum and Go. Wow. Do you go there before or after you eat out at Touch? And then there's STD. I'm not really sure what STD stands for, but it's a flea market. Okay. I don't care what it stands for. That's awful! I suppose, though, it's better than the FAG Bearing company in Joplin. Wow. Double Wow.

Has anybody out there found any place names better than these?